Men vs. Men AND Women

I feel that gender always takes a role in the leadership experience. Whether its who is leading or who is being lead the atmosphere changes, so in turn you must as well. I do not believe for a moment that we all lead women and men the same. If we are in a group of women we tend to be harder on each other because we expect more from women. When leading men we take into account that we expect them to be strong as well but do not relate ourselves personally to their strengths as we do women. We do not know what it is like to be a man so we do not force more on them than we think they can handle, from an outside prospective. It takes a good woman to know a good man. But, in a position of leadership we do not always know the persons who we are leading very well at the beginning of the journey together, we are often times building relationships not extenuating them. So, it seems as if there can be one of two things going on: we expect a lot from the men that we have known previously, and we expect too little from men that we do not yet know. If you are a woman leading amongst woman you feel strong and empowered much of the time. You feel that there is an immediate connection because of the biological relation to one another. Although there are times when we may feel discomfort around women, we, as women, are usually able to find something within one another to ease the discomfort. We can always talk about our kids, cramps, OBG/YN appointments, or any other womanly aspects of our lives, because there are going to be commonalities no matter what type of person we may be, we are all women. On the matter of leading men and women, this can be a tricky subject. It becomes more of an individual thing in this case. I would initially treat everyone equally but as I see how everyone works, and what people prefer to do or not do I will adapt to their needs and come to them individually for encouragement in a way that I see fit for that person. There are certain aspects of leadership that appeal to men and women. Most people want their leader to exemplify stength and confidence in what they are doing. But sometimes men need for a woman to make them feel like a man to encourage them to work for the team; and woman may need to feel stronger, or as strong as the men in some fashion to work with them in a group. Everyone needs to feel like they have strengths in a group and of course everyone will have weaknesses, and these come by the person. By identifying the group strengths/weaknesses and individual strengths/weaknesses it is easier to lead men and women at the same time because the group does not always have to be divided into these two groups. If we ignore sex then it truly takes no merit in the group. If we just see a group with different aspects we can fix them as a group not as men and women.

My Residential Experience

My first residential experience was here at Chatham. I live in Fickes on the first floor. At first I felt independant... and then my family left and went home. I began to immediately miss their precense. But with the help of my friends I got over that feeling soon enough. I started to feel independant and like I belonged. I noticed that while everyone seemed to keep to themselves that only lasted about a few hours. By the third day of orientation eveyone had formed "cliques" and stayed with the same people at all times. Everyone was friendly to each other in the hallways and passing each other on campus but once settled that's where they were. We may think that college is different but it is the same as high school in the sense that when we find where we want to be and that's where we stay. The only difference is the labels. There doesn't seem to be any of that. But there is still the "Oh Laura, the one who hangs out with Allison from down the hall Laura? Oh yeah, I know her" type of thing. That is how we identify no matter where we are, or so it seems. No one is ever an individual or else we would not know who they are. But that is not always such a bad thing. People are always known for something whether it may be who they hang out with or what it is that they do. It's just that we do not know each other well enough to identify with anything other than the daily habits that we witness. Although, it seems as if people have known each other for years in how they interact with one another. People are always leaning on one another, talking about their problems, sharing anything that their new friends may need. It's not just that they are generous but everyone genuinely cares about the people that they hang out with. It is miraculous to see that people can be so close in such little time. That's the one thing about college that will always be good. The cycle of life is different. You live with these people, eat with these people, learn with everyone, and at the end of the day you are that much stronger together because of the massive time spent together. Never would we have gotten that in high school. College is a beautiful place.